3.15.2010

It's been a while since I've done this:

12/03/10

It's a sunless day but I'm outside anyway, still anticipating that summer that gave us preview last week. The ashtray is already full, though I don't suspect many people have been sitting out here this morning. Rather, it was probably not emptied at close last night, the putts in the flowerpot probably weeks old. Still, I add to the pile and smoke as much as I would in fairer weather, my bones radiating warmth such that I can't tell whether the mist around me is steam or smoke.

Cigarettes are always best a few days after they've been opened, after the breaking of the seal oxidises them or something. I don't know the entire chemistry of it, but everything's better when it's not oppressed by plastic and packaging. Everything in this world breathes one way or another, I suppose. I can't speak for extraterristrial substances, surrounded by things other than oxygen and nitrogen, but I'm sure they find a way. Look at all those planets in the sky, thouse bright red and blue animals who grow and move and live so far aabove us. At times I'm sure they were capitve, like a child in the placenta of its mother's womb, and were one day freed and given the chance of existance.

If cigarettes must be freed by the hands of an addict, if babies are pushed from their cocoon by eager women with the help of gloved hands, does it follow that everything else in this universe myst have its own liberater in something or someone else? And if not, what could possibly have the strength and previous mindness to release itself from the constraints of the outside?

Of course, even when we are initially freed, liberation during existance is still required. Once opened, we are bombarded by the prospects of reenslavement, and we must use our own lives to counteract these temptations. This, I would say, is most evident in volitional beings, for enslavement loves to trample on free will. I cannot speak for other beings, for their movement and desires are outside of my own dimension, but there must be something trying to lure them back from whence they came, to some degree or definition or another.

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